Main Reasons Why Couples Try to Open up Their Relationship
Monogamous people can’t understand couples who want to open up their relationships to someone new. Luckily, there are fewer 100% monogamous couples than you think. Even couples who are matches made in heaven sometimes fantasize about sharing a bed with someone new. Today we’ll look into the main reasons that push people over the line to look for new experiences.
Desire to Explore their Sexuality with Someone of a Different Gender
Some people think that a guy is always the one insisting on a threesome, but the reality is different. Not that guys reject their girlfriends when they come up with the idea to invite another woman into their bed, but girls usually start the fire. Why? Because they are curious.
Many girls fantasize about adventures with other women. It might be because of all of the movies and TV shows that imply that girls need to explore things at college. Such things become trends quickly; they can even evolve into traditions. But we don’t think movies are to blame (or thank). In our opinion, pop culture imitates the real world. And the proof of that is couples looking for a girlfriend on a specialized dating site with many single girls thirsty for adventures. Some of them give up after the first night on chat, but those who really want to treat themselves to an adventure like that, usually achieve it. Why? Because a man always has the last word. It’s always some version of: “Yes, dear, that one is beautiful. Let’s chat with that one.”
Partners Have Different Libido Levels
Female curiosity is one of the best reasons for opening up a monogamous relationship. In such cases, both partners have a great time. Lady gets what she wants; a guy at least gets to be there.
The second reason for seeking side partners while in a relationship isn’t that harmless. Sex-related problems destroy many relationships. More often than you think, that happens because of different libido levels. One side feels like there should be more sex, while the other feels like they’re having sex too often or exactly as much as needed.
When that happens, there are 4 solutions:
- break up and find someone with the same libido level;
- the person with higher libido has to sacrifice some of their passion;
- the person with lower libido could seek help (if their libido is unhealthily low);
- they can seek help as a couple and invite a 3rd person to help satisfy the other one.
Contrary to popular opinion, it’s not always the case that guys have higher libidos than girls. But couples usually invite another girl to their bed, rarely men. Why? Because a girl can satisfy both partners in a heterosexual relationship. A guy can’t.
Another problem with libido is that it peaks at different times of the day for different people. That can cause problems too. If one side wants to start the day with an orgasm, they won’t be happy with someone whose libido hits After Eight like they’re famous mint chocolate. In such cases, conversation and meeting in the middle may help too. But inviting someone new under the sheets is more fun, so why not.
They Are Not the Monogamous Type
How many animals do you know that are monogamous? Penguins? A couple of parrots? Foxes? Most of the animal kingdom isn’t buying that settle for a life story. You may like it or not, but humans are still part of the animal kingdom. It means that we still have instincts; they’re keeping us alive (even though we like to pretend we’re closer to the divine than monkeys).
The thing is that most people learn how to silence their instincts to procreate and have different partners. Don’t get us wrong. That’s great because it’s a sign of civilization. But should we judge people who decide to walk on the wild side? Absolutely not.
If two people are soulmates, it doesn’t mean they’re necessarily monogamous. Many perfect couples broke up because of such things. And there was a better solution. Opening up their relationship. That would give everyone more freedom, but they wouldn’t separate.
As a Step to Save a Shaky Relationship
The last reason for opening up a monogamous relationship is different from the rest on this list. This is the only case when we think it’s better to break up than to seek the 3rd person. However, that doesn’t mean millions of couples aren’t trying to keep their sinking ships above water by inviting more people. That often leads to a breakup because trust is crucial in every open relationship. Shaky relationships get shaky because they aren’t built on the foundation of trust. Those are the relationships in which a guy insists on a paternity test even when he knows no one else touched his wife. Regardless of your gender, don’t be silly and stay in a toxic relationship. There are many good people out there. You’ll find your match (or two if you seek couples).